The Sister Paradox Read online

  Kari looked as if she had been hit with a brick. “I do not believe it. Is that why you cannot avoid the ads?”

  “I’m sure it has something to do with it. Look, Kari, I know I said I’d come along for this, uh, quest of yours, but you never said anything about basilisks or…” I waved my hand around. “This.”

  “What?” She gazed around. “Said anything about what?”

  “This forest.”

  “What about it?”

  Infuriating. That’s the one-word definition of “sister,” I decided. How could I admit to her that this place was scaring me when she seemed completely at home? She was worried about the basilisks, true, but since the creatures also terrified me, that wasn’t exactly a point to use against her. “Kari, how about we head back home?”

  She looked confused. “Your home? Go back to where we started? What would be the reason for that?”

  “Safety?”

  “That is not a reason!”

  “Yes, it is! It’s a very good reason.”

  “But we have a quest to fulfill, Liam. You said you would help.”

  “You never mentioned basilisks,” I repeated. I knew I had her there.

  “You are serious.” Kari stood facing me, her hands on her hips. “You cannot be serious, but you are. You actually want to quit already.”

  “No! I just want to, uh, go back that way. Toward home.”

  “I do not believe it. You are my brother! And we are not even there, yet. We have not confronted any of the challenges—”

  “Challenges?”

  “I cannot imagine—”

  “Hold on,” I interrupted. “What’s that about challenges?”

  She waved one hand dramatically. “Oh, nothing you would care about, I am certain.”

  “I care about challenges. Are we talking dangerous challenges?”

  “They would not be challenges if there was not any danger involved, would they?” Kari demanded.

  I shook my head, looking back the way I thought we had come. “That’s enough for me. Let’s go.”

  “I am not going back! We cannot afford to waste the time!”

  “Well…” This was a problem. I had a pretty strong feeling that if I walked back alone the way we’d come, I wouldn’t be able to find home. More likely, whatever was lurking in those shadows would have me for lunch, or I’d step off that special path that might or might not exist and the trees would wallop me big time. “Kari, be reasonable.”

  “I cannot afford to be what you call reasonable, Liam. I have a job to do! If you will not help, then I will have to do it alone.” She turned away.

  “Hold on! You said you can’t do this alone.”

  “I will have to,” she shot back over her shoulder.

  I gave her stiff back the nastiest look I could manage. I was stuck, one way or the other. I was mad enough at the moment that if it hadn’t been for my strong suspicions that I couldn’t get home in one piece without Kari I would have started walking right then and there.

  No matter what you may have heard, I’m not a total idiot. Since I couldn’t walk, I started thinking. I had told Mom I would bring Kari back, and I couldn’t do that if I let her go off to face some “challenges” on her own. For that matter, I didn’t think I could face myself if I let her go on alone now. I mean, we had started this together and I had said I’d help. How could I leave her, sister or not, without feeling like a total loser?

  Yeah, maybe it’s dumb, but people aren’t supposed to leave other people in the lurch. Heroes in the movies don’t do that. As a matter of fact, in the movies people who leave other people to fend for themselves usually ended up getting nailed first. But the point was that in stories you don’t walk away from someone who needs you. I’d never thought much about applying that in real life, but Kari, annoying as she was, said she needed me.

  She needed me to keep our universes from exploding. Maybe getting home shouldn’t be my first priority, not if that meant waiting around for everything to blow up, even if my sister was leading me through the Basilisk Haunted Forest of Doom toward The Dangerous But Undefined Challenges.

  She was literally leading the way despite any dangers, though. If Kari had been any other girl but my sister I would have been thinking by now that she was pretty hard core. “You’re right. You win.”

  She looked over her shoulder at me. “I win?”

  “Yes. You win,” I repeated. “Let’s go get mauled or eaten or turned into rocks or whatever. Lead on.”

  Kari twirled about to face me and smiled so brightly the forest gloom seemed to retreat a bit. “I knew you were just jesting with me again! Really, I did. Or were you testing me, to see if I would abandon you once I learned you had not the skills of a hunter? You should have known that would never happen, dearest brother. Whatever the challenges prove to be, we shall face them together!”

  Yeah. Great. I’d get mauled with my sister. That’d be a lot better than getting mauled all by myself. Not. “Can you do me a favor, Kari? From now on, could you mention stuff like basilisks before we’re actually threatened by them?”

  “Oh. You were not expecting basilisks?” Kari seemed almost as surprised as when I’d said I couldn’t sneak through the woods.

  “No.”

  “Really?”

  “Really.”

  “Very well. I will try to give you warning next time. Do not worry, Liam. The walls between worlds are weak enough that their guardians cannot hinder us much… And, after all, having basilisks around is a good thing, in a way.”

  I gave her a suspicious look. “Why is having giant snakes that can turn us into stone around a good thing?”

  “Dragons hate basilisks, as I am certain you know,” Kari said cheerfully. “So as long as we are near basilisks, we do not need to worry very much about dragons.”

  “Dragons?” I took a deep breath. “Kari?”

  “Yes?”

  “Payback for this is going to be huge.”

  “Payback?”

  “I’ll explain later.”

  Kari started walking again. I tried to move a little quieter this time, but Kari’s occasional pained looks back at me told me I wasn’t doing a great job.

  As we kept walking the gloom started to lift bit by bit, the vague shapes retreated until I couldn’t see any more trace of them, and I noticed Kari gradually relaxing. The trees got a little smaller and started to thin out. At some point I stopped feeling like the trees were staring at my back. I began catching glimpses of open meadows ahead, where amazingly green grass shone under a bright sun. Finally, Kari turned to me and waved me up beside her. “That is it. The first challenge is overcome. We are Elsewhere!”

  I tried to unknot muscles tensed from waiting for the slithering sounds of giant snakes looking for a couple of snack-size teenagers. “It’s safe now?”

  “Safe?” Kari asked. “Not exactly. Actually, no.”

  My muscles tensed up again. “Do we still have to worry about basilisks?”

  “Of course not! There are no basilisks in this region, and we will see my friends soon. But traveling in such a small party, just the two of us, exposes us to more peril.”

  It’s funny, but up to that point I hadn’t really given any thought to Kari having friends in her nowhere place. She had mentioned that Archimaede thing, but beyond that all I had were mentions of things like unicorns. I hadn’t paid too much attention to those because, let’s face it, girls are hung up on unicorns. “What are your friends like, Kari?”

  “Oh, they are all sorts.”

  Somehow I didn’t doubt that. “Big sorts? With big swords and heavy armor?”

  Kari actually laughed. “Not so much of swords and armor, perhaps. But you can depend upon them. They have taken care of me and taught me many important things.”

  Maybe a half an hour ago I would’ve made some joke to myself about all the things Kari hadn’t been taught, but that last half hour had done a lot to shake my confidence that she was clueless and I was c
lued-in. I had a growing feeling that the shoe was on the other foot now.

  Despite Kari’s warning, there didn’t seem to be anything preparing to eat or massacre us. Instead, the place felt incredibly peaceful. We passed through patches of dappled sunlight, the green grass of the meadows beckoning not far ahead now. Birds were singing and some of them spiraled down to perch on Kari and exchange gossip with her. Aside from the songs of the birds and the sighing of the wind, it was quiet in a way that was almost spooky. I looked up at the sky and all around, slowly realizing that in Kari’s Elsewhere I wouldn’t hear any motors running nearby or in the distance, no roar of jet aircraft passing overhead, no throbbing of helicopters. No lawn mowers or leaf blowers, no music. I could have hauled out my phone and cranked up some tunes, but somehow that felt totally wrong.

  No, this place was quiet in ways I had never experienced. Just the wind and the birds and… “Are those dogs?”

  “Wolves!” Kari cried as the pack burst into howls and sped toward us. She had her sword out and was using her free hand to back me toward the nearest tree. “I am sorry, Liam. In my haste to leave your house I forgot to remind you to bring your sword.”

  “I don’t have a sword.”

  I finally had the satisfaction of seeing Kari’s jaw actually drop in amazement. “That is not funny right now, Liam.”

  “I’m not trying to be funny. I don’t have a sword.”

  I could see Kari watching the wolves advance, swinging her sword lightly before her in short, slow arcs. “But you know how to use a sword, do you not? Of course you do.”

  “Of course I don’t.” Kari made some sort of strangled sound, though she kept her eyes on the wolves. “Kari, people in my world don’t use swords.”

  “What an impossible place! Who could imagine such a thing? How do you defend yourselves from packs of wolves such as this?” Kari demanded.

  “Well, we could use guns, I guess. But most people don’t have them either.”

  “No wonder your world is overrun with ads! It is your own fault!”

  “I can’t argue with that.” My foot encountered what felt like a good-sized fallen branch and I bent to grab it. To my relief, it turned out to be about the size of a baseball bat. I got a good grip on the base. “This I can use.”

  Kari stole a sidelong glance and grinned in relief. “That is wonderful. You are not totally helpless.”

  Put that way, it didn’t sound so wonderful.

  The wolves were getting pretty close, moving slowly now and spreading out, snarling as they came. They were bigger than I’d thought wolves would be, big enough to trash just about any dog that I knew of that might have tried to take them on. The wolves had matted fur and their snarls revealed big, sharp teeth which didn’t seem to have ever been cleaned by a vet. It’s funny just how loud a wolf’s snarl can sound when you are in an otherwise almost-silent forest. I got a few whiffs of their scent and realized they also stank pretty bad.

  If I could’ve seen any place to run to, I’d have been running at that point. I hoped I wasn’t shaking bad enough for Kari to see.

  I looked over at her. Kari faced the wolves without a quiver of fear, her face intent, her sword hand steady. “Liam,” she whispered, as if trying to avoid letting the wolves hear what she said, “we have had no chance to practice defending each other. Watch my back and I shall watch yours.”

  “I…I…”

  “Do not worry, Liam. You can count on me.”

  “All right.” I didn’t tell her I wasn’t sure how much she could count on me. I had a definite lack of experience with using an improvised club to fight off wolf packs and I was scared half out of my mind. It occurred to me that I’d told Kari I didn’t know how to defend myself using the weapons around here and yet she hadn’t hesitated to stand with me and fight. I knew plenty of people who I think would’ve been all too happy to literally throw me to the wolves while they ran for cover. But the sister I didn’t have, the one I’d just met, wasn’t going to leave me.

  To think I’d tried to walk out on her back in the forest.

  “They are about to make their move,” Kari whispered again. Her sword was moving very slowly now, its point ready to leap in any direction. I tried to imagine I was in a virtual-reality game where I couldn’t really get hurt, hefted my improvised bat, and prepared to see if I could knock a few wolves out of the park.

  A big wolf missing half of one ear suddenly leaped straight at Kari. She barely seemed to move her sword, but the wolf flew off to one side, yelping in pain, leaving a red spray of blood arcing through the air in its wake. I caught a blur coming from my left and realized another wolf was leaping at her. Before I could really think about it, my tree branch bat came down and around as I swung with all of my might and connected. The wolf went flying back into the pack, bowling over several of its companions. My hands stung and I almost dropped the branch, but managed to recover my balance and keep my grip.

  “Well done,” Kari said.

  “You, too.” I really wished I had a sword. Or maybe a suit of armor. Or an attack helicopter that could lift us out of here.

  What I had was a broken tree branch and a girl who thought I could be trusted to watch her back. So I tried to swallow my fear and look menacing. The wolves didn’t seem to be fooled, though.

  The pack slunk closer and I had a feeling that more than two were getting ready to leap this time. It seemed like a really good moment for the cavalry to arrive.

  Chapter Four

  Of Unicorns and Beavers

  Hooves thundered behind and to our right. I had a moment to wonder if the cavalry really had arrived, or maybe King Arthur and his knights. I’d be happy either way. The wolves were turning tail and bolting for the deeper woods. Kari raised her sword over her head and started singing something in a language I didn’t recognize at all.

  The sound of hooves split around the tree we were backed up against, and then I saw unicorns sweeping past on either side. No, I didn’t think they were horses at first. If you had seen them you wouldn’t have thought that, either.

  Before I knew what was happening the wolves were vanishing into the depths of the forest, pursued by a few of the unicorns. The rest of the unicorns slowed to a walk, then turned and came cantering back toward us so gracefully that they seemed to be gliding over the ground, while I stood there with my mouth hanging open and the branch dangling forgotten from one hand.

  Kari cheered again, bringing me back to my senses. “Oh, Liam, my friends are here!”

  “Your friends?” I took another look. I know meeting a sister you don’t have and following her through a haunted forest while worrying about basilisks isn’t exactly what you’d call normal, but actually seeing unicorns who had just rescued me from wolves was too much. The day had just reached past some limit in my brain and gotten too strange. “Kari, would you pinch me?”

  “What?” She gave me a startled glance. “Pinch you?”

  “Yeah. I need somebody to help me make sure I’m not dreaming all this.”

  “As you wish.” Kari returned her sword to its sheath on her back, balled up her fist and punched my arm.

  “Ow!” My sister, it turns out, has a wicked punch. “Why’d you do that?”

  “You asked me to do that.”

  “I asked you to pinch me! I didn’t ask you to punch me!”

  “Pinch, punch. Let us not get too concerned with details, Liam. Did I hurt you?”

  “Hurt me?” My little sister? “No! No! You didn’t hurt me. You just, uh, surprised me. Yeah. That’s it.”

  “I regret surprising you, Liam. Are you now convinced that you are awake?”

  “Yeah, I’m convinced.” I took another look at Kari’s friends. “I think.” Kari raised her fist with a questioning expression. “I’m sure! I’m sure!”

  “Good. I cannot wait for you to meet my friends.”

  I’d seen plenty of pictures of unicorns, but of course I’d never seen a real one. Let me tell you, the pictures
don’t do them justice. You would figure a unicorn just looks like a horse with a horn stuck on its forehead, but you would be wrong. The unicorn closest to us was amazingly beautiful. Its white hair shimmered as if rainbows were dancing across the surface and every muscle, line, and limb of the unicorn was perfectly proportioned. It was the first time I could think of that I’d seen something I could actually call flawless.

  Kari leaned close to me to whisper. “She is named White Lady of Eveness. She is a very important unicorn. I think you would call her the principle unicorn in your world.”

  The unicorn walked slowly toward us, moving so elegantly that her hooves appeared to part the blades of grass instead of walking on them. She came right up to Kari, putting her muzzle over Kari’s shoulder so Kari could hug her neck. When the unicorn drew back, she was smiling. I know. Horses can’t smile. Well, unicorns can. Don’t ask me how. This one did.

  Then she spoke, which normally would’ve freaked me out, but by that point I’m not sure anything would’ve surprised me. “Kari, my spirit daughter, it is good to see you.”

  Kari almost, but not quite, had the same expression she’d had when looking at Mom. “White Lady, it is good to see you! The other world is so strange.”

  The unicorn tossed her head. “I feared to let you go there. You know that.”

  “But I had to go, and see whom I have returned with! My own brother!” Kari turned her radiant smile on me, leaving me feeling a little ashamed for the hard time I’d given her earlier.

  The unicorn looked at me, but I didn’t spot any radiance in her expression. “Yes. So you have.” She didn’t seem impressed by me at all. “He has agreed to help?”

  “Of course! I told you he would.”

  “He is of there, not here. Do not forget this, daughter.” The unicorn rolled one big eye at me. “Why does he not speak to me?”

  Kari tried to whisper in the unicorn’s ear but I didn’t have any trouble hearing her. “I know this sounds strange, but I do not think that Liam has ever met a unicorn before, White Lady.”